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Actors don't lose auditions because

they mess up lines.

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They lose them because of something

quieter,

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what I call

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apology.

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Energy

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it's the tone, the posture, the need to

explain,

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and it sends a message you don't want

its end

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to day we're breaking down.

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Why confidence isn't arrogance?

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Why presence beats perfection?

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And how to walk into every audition

like you.

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Belong

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guess what?

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Because you do.

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This is casting actor's ghastly

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well.

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Hello, and welcome to today's episode

of casting actors cast.

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I'm Jeff driesback, a casting director

with mccorkl casting in New York.

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And before that, I was an actor for

over twenty years.

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I'm now giving back to the acting

community as much information as I

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possibly can in these 400 plus episodes

of the podcast.

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And I welcome you.

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Aboard, if you're a first time

listener, I'm just excited that you're

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here.

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If you've been listening for a while,

I'm so glad that you're still here.

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So we're going to talk a little bit

about this apology thing that I see.

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But first, this is that moment of the

podcast where I get to say thank you

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for tuning in to casting actors cast

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people have asked me why.

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The title is casting actors

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the podcast,

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the broadcast,

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casting actors cast.

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Do you get it?

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Ok, maybe I won't get that email any

more.

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Listen, I invite you to check out the

website, casting actor's cast.

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All one word, dot com there's a place

that says, dive into the talent pool.

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And you leave me your name and your

email address.

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You can leave me a message, but when

you submit that

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you'll open up a secret menu of some

choices that are absolutely 100 free.

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One is a book undoing voice over work.

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The other is a free video called

casting secrets.

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What they don't tell you, but I'm going

to tell you in this video.

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Also, the website contains information

about my new book.

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That's out, it's now on audiobook.

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I also have a course that's available.

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Solve all that stuff.

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All kinds of really cool stuff to help

you feel more comfortable and more

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confident as a professional actor in

the business, in the industry.

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That's who I'm talking to.

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And I also know that there are a lot of

students out there that really are kind

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of anxious to get as much information

as they can about film and television

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opportunities.

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And that's why I am here also I really

want to make sure you can up your game

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and be more comfortable and more

confident with your film and television auditions.

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All right, let's jump into the subject,

shall we?

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So I have to share this.

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I, I am an adjunct

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at a conservatory, and I love the

students there.

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And the work is really, really

exceptional, and it's been just a joy

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and a privilege to be there.

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And I don't want to necessarily give

them a plug, but I'm happy to do so.

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The norwa conservatory of the arts has

been

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just on this successful run of training

actors in the profession,

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everything from musical theater to

musical theater and dance to acting for

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the camera and acting in general.

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So there's a lot of really good

students there that I'm thrilled to

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work with.

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But I am thinking right now of one

particular student,

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who, after almost every time I have a

conversation with them, they apologize,

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or, god forbid, I give a note, an

adjustment for the scene that they're

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working on on camera.

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It's like, the first thing I hear is,

I'm sorry,

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really,

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you're sorry for what.

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I'm just giving you a note and giving

you an adjustment.

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And you know what?

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I just don't want that to become a

habit for anybody,

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because

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here's what apology.

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Energy feels like.

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It shows up as well.

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Sometimes it becomes like nervous

laughter.

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Sometimes I see the apologist kind of

over explaining their choices that

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they've made.

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You see, what I thought I would do is

fill in the blank.

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And over explaining

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what their choices were does not need

necessarily help us

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in the development of the character in

this particular scene.

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Sometimes apologists' energy ends up

asking permission to restart.

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Can I start again?

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There's an interesting psychology about

that that I haven't quite figured it

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out yet.

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I think it has a little bit to do with

wanting to regain a sense of control,

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feeling like it's out of your hands the

minute you start speaking.

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But by stopping and restarting,

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that controlled

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kicks back in.

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And I'm not sure that that's really a

useful thing to demonstrate

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or to experience in an audition.

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The other thing that I see when people

apologize

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their posture oftentimes gets very

small.

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Shrinking posture is what i'll call it.

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Also there's this kind of apologetic

tone in the voice.

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There's also minimizing presence.

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Even a hesitant

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hi, hello,

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can signal uncertainty, and uncertainty

affects

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how your work is being received.

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So in this podcast,

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we're going to try to help you through

this by talking about the psychology,

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but also giving you some practical

applications for you by the end of this

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podcast.

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So I'm glad you're here.

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So why do actors do this?

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Well, I think one reason why we get a

lot of apologies in auditions, especially

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sometimes on the set even.

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But if you've booked the job, that

should probably dissipate in my mind a

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little bit.

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But it doesn't always do that.

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But what I think actors do is they

simply want to be liked.

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And by apologizing,

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there's a sense of

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And that kind of humility

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is being perceived as being attractive

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and being likable.

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And I have to say, I don't believe that

that is the case.

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I also see that actors want to

demonstrate that they're being cooperative

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when they apologize.

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And that doesn't really butter the

bread.

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You know, if you want to be

cooperative, then just, why don't you cooperate?

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You don't need to apologize about any

choices that you make, about any

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energy that you are demonstrating.

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Because I know that actors want to be

easy to work with.

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And there's something being said about

a subservient

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by apologizing so much.

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And see, I have to say that apology,

energy is not

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collaboration.

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It is self protection.

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I love knowing

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how collaborative an actor is in an

audition process.

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Whether it's a first round audition, or

whether it's a call back or a chemistry read,

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you can be open and receptive to

feedback.

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But it's about feeling like you are in

a collaborative

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environment, because guess what you are.

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But there is also a hidden message, I

think, of apology energy.

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It communicates the following.

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I'm not sure I belong here.

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You see, when you apologize

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that sometimes is the signal.

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I don't know if I belong here.

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I'm sorry.

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But

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even when you absolutely do

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so, casting, I promise you isn't

looking for perfect.

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Where you are, looking for the

following.

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We're looking for

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here it is.

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Prepared.

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We're looking for present.

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We're looking for adjustable or

malleable.

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Good word.

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Malleable that's such a good word for

an actor.

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I think

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we're also looking for professionalism.

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Perfection

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is not required

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at all.

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Guess what presence is?

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So let's talk about confidence versus

arrogance.

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Right after this

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welcome back, we're talking about

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apologizing in how that can really

sabotage you in an audition.

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And we're now talking about confidence

versus arrogance.

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And let me explain, actors often fear

confidence will be read as arrogance.

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I don't want to be come across as a

jerk.

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But guess what it doesn't.

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Confidence reads as ease.

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See, arrogance reads as resistance.

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So that's a protective element to the

personality.

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That kind of resistance that's sort of

pushing somebody away with an attitude

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of that I can only describe

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as unpleasant

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that's arrogance.

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So there is a difference between the

two.

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Confidence and arrogance are not

synonymous.

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So please make that really clear for

yourself.

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Don't worry about whether you're

arrogant.

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If you're open to working in a

collaborative environment, you belong.

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So

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let's talk about what I call the

professional shift.

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Instead of saying, I'm sorry.

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Why don't you just replace that

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it's easy.

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Just replace it with.

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Let's try that again.

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See how much more powerful that is.

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Instead of explaining,

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just simply make another choice.

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Don't try to defend the reason why you

made the choice.

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That you did

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just make a new choice.

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See, you're demonstrating

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your malleability.

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You're demonstrating your ability to

shift gears, to take a different

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approach, to make discoveries

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that you didn't demonstrate when you

did it before.

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That's all.

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So instead of shrinking, I just want

you to stay grounded with all of your choices.

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Let me talk a little bit further about

why over explaining hurts you.

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And this has happened so many times.

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But when actors explain their choices,

it suggests that they don't trust the work.

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Trust invites confidence.

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Confidence

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invites trust.

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Think about that.

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It's as simple as that.

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So instead of just processing

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all of that nervous energy into all of

these

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little, effective,

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affected areas

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of your

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personality in an audition room,

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do yourself a favor.

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Breathe,

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be present,

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be collaborative.

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And here's a real casting room

observation.

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The actors who feel calm, the actors

who feel present and grounded, they

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create a sense of ease in the room.

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And that ease translates to

professionalism.

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And I can tell you that professionalism

just simply translates to trust.

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And when I know I can trust that actor

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they're saying

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that they are able to deliver the goods

on the set,

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and if they are right for the role,

guess what?

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Automatic call back done.

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Done.

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If I have to work a little harder to see

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if you have that trust

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in you, then I'm afraid it's a real

possibility that you might just fall by

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the wayside.

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And that's the confidence illusion.

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confidence is not certainty.

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It is comfort with uncertainty.

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I know that sounded weird in it, but

let me say that again.

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Confidence is not certainty.

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Confidence is comfort

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with certainty.

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I think that that's

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so valuable,

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something to hang on to.

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It'll make you strong.

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Speaking of strong, I know strong

actors do this.

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They stay engaged,

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they listen, they adjust, they remain

available.

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They trust the moment.

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No apology required.

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H'm

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let's replace permission with presents.

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You are not asking to be there.

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In the audition,

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let me say that again.

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You are not asking to be there.

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You were invited to be there.

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So therefore you belong.

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There is a difference.

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That's why the apologist.

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It doesn't make sense to me.

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I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm late.

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I'm sorry I'm not prepared.

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I'm sorry I'm not feeling as good as I

wish.

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I felt

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blab, LA Bab, LA blas

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just

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that occasionally

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you might need to take your own

temperature

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just to find out if you're falling into

that apologized trap.

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So here's a quick practice for you.

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Practice entering a room and saying, hi.

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Now

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real simple, hi,

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with grounded breath.

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I want you to keep it simple.

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I want you to keep it clear.

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I want you to keep it present.

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Feel the authority shift.

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It'll absolutely help you feel better.

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It'll help you feel grounded

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when you say I belong.

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Or your subtext is, I'm really excited

about showing you how I am going to

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play this part,

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if that's your subtext.

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Now, you're in a level playing field

with everybody.

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And I've said this before,

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but the big secret to show business is

that everybody is afraid.

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You see, the casting director is afraid

they're never going to get hired.

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The director is afraid they're going to

have a flop on their hands.

299

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The producer's afraid they're going to

lose their shirt.

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Even the intern is afraid that they're

going to do something wrong that might

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cost them their internship.

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And the actor is afraid that they're

not going to book the job.

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And so you have this, what I call this

mosh pit of fear

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happening.

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And so if you are

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aware of that, if you believe what I've

just told you,

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then I think it's really important to

ask the question,

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what can I do to alleviate

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the fear?

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Now, once you have the answer to that

question,

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that's the energy and the presence that

you can go into any audition, no matter what,

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and feel better.

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Because I know this to be true.

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Actor's book when they bring their

presence,

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not permission seeking,

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all right, here's a call to action.

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If you've ever apologized your way

through an audition,

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if that's happened to you before, I

want you to share this episode with a

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friend, and I want you to make a pact

with that friend.

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The fact is this,

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no apology, energy

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only

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presents.

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If you do that,

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it won't take you very long,

whatsoever, to start making that

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audition.

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Experience,

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honestly enjoyable.

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You'll think of that experience as just

simply an opportunity

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to share your talent.

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And when you can do that,

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then there's no reason why you have to

live in your head and be, I don't know,

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reauditioning in your head on the way

home.

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Make sense?

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00:17:25,879 --> 00:17:26,46

Eh?

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Listen, if you've found this to be a

useful episode for you, or perhaps

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somebody would really benefit from

listening to this episode.

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Please feel free to pass it along.

339

00:17:35,288 --> 00:17:37,57

Again, here's my shameless wish.

340

00:17:37,290 --> 00:17:39,392

And that is, if you could leave me a

thumbs up, alike.

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Please share a review.

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00:17:41,461 --> 00:17:41,961

If you would.

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00:17:42,262 --> 00:17:44,431

Especially on iTunes that's like the

big deal.

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ITunes really always uses that

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feedback algorithm to promote the work.

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So I would, really,

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it would really mean a lot if you did

that.

348

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And I look forward to seeing you on the

next episode.

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Thanks again.

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This is casting actors.